Dead Men's Truth
by llamalovesdragons
Summary: The truth is out. Now bad things are happening. Skulduggery and Valkyrie must run if they have any chance of surviving what is to come. And the Sanctuary's declaring war on Ireland, everything has been coming to this. Set after TMS. Please R&R.
1. Dark Secrets

**Welcome to Dead Men's Truth. Read on to find out everything. Read on and enjoy. And don't forget to review. I want to know what all of you think about it...**

**Disclaimer**** (for whole story): I do not own any of the characters, such as Skulduggery Pleasant, Valkyrie Cain, Tanith Low, etc. Any similarities to events or people (alive, deceased or fictional) are purely accidental/coincidental. I do, however, get to own any other character that have never before appeared in any of the books written by Derek Landy, unless stated otherwise.**

**Love: your favourite llama that writes.**

**1**

**Dark Secrets**

"I know what they aren't telling us." Valkyrie frowned mentally, then struggled awake. Skulduggery Pleasant glanced at her, face white underneath his hat, then back at the man standing in front of her. Her powers were bound, she noted, seeing the shackles around her wrists. Her shoulder hurt. "I know their secrets. I know the dark truths they are keeping from everyone."

Valkyrie's eyes widened when she realised what he was talking about. She looked at Skulduggery, who was watching the man, head tilted.

"You're going to let Valkyrie go." She hadn't noticed Scrutinious, sweating beading his face. And Ravel and Ghastly stood with Skulduggery.

The man shook his head. "No. That's not going to work on me. I need to save everyone." He turned, pointed a gun into her face. "It was too late to save everyone from him, but it's not too late to save us now."

"We don't what you mean, but maybe we can talk this out without anyone getting hurt," Scrutinious suggested.

"I don't want to die," the man said, crying now.

"No one has to die here."

"I couldn't save us when he turned into Vile, but I can stop her from turning in Darquesse." He shifted the gun, then shook his head. "I don't want to die," he repeated, then pressed the gun to his temple and pulled the trigger. Everyone flinched, and Valkyrie looked away, feeling sick. Her head swam, and the silence in the room was starting to get uncomfotable.

She looked up slowly. Ghastly, Ravel and Scrutinious stared at her in shock. "What did he mean, turn into Darquesse?" Ravel asked, face pale.

"I can explain," she started to say. "I'm sorry. We've been trying to change since we found out about it." She was crying now. "I don't want to kill everyone."

Ghastly turned to Skulduggery, and when he spoke, his voice was hollow. "You were Lord Vile?" When Skulduggery didn't answer, he continued. "You were the one that killed my mother?"

Skulduggery looked up slowly. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I'm sorry that you found out this way."

"He was telling the truth?" Ravel looked pleadingly at Scrutinious, who nodded unhappily.

"I didn't feel anything strange when he said it."

"I've spent my life trying to make up for the mistakes I made, but I can't. The things I did, they were terrible. Too bad for anyone to make up for. But I still try. And I will continue to try."

"Skulduggery. We may have to arrest you," Ravel said.

"What, no!" Valkyrie shouted, getting to her feet. Skulduggery held his hands out. "You can't. He isn't Vile. Vile is a different person. When he puts the armour on, he isn't Skulduggery anymore." She looked to Ghastly to help, who turned and walked away.

Ravel looked at her. "What do you mean, puts the armour on?" Ravel paled even more. "That's how you defeated Melancholia. You didn't stop her as you. You stopped her as Lord Vile. You tore up O'Connell Street, didn't you?"

"I had to. The only way to defeat Melancholia was too become Vile, and the way to defeat Vile was for me to become-" Valkyrie broke off and swallowed thickly.

Ravel moaned. "But that's the only time you've used them, yes?"

Valkyrie hesitated. "No," she admitted. "We had to use them to defeat Arggedion and Kitana and her friends."

Ravel moaned again.

"I want you to hep Valkyrie, if I can't. Don't let her become Darquesse. Find a way to save her," Skulduggery said to Ravel, ignoring her. "For old times sakes."

"For old times sakes," Ravel repeated, then nodded. "Ok. We'll help her."

Valkyrie felt sick. They had taken the shackles off and let her go home. Nodoubt htey were organising a look out, or a small group of mages to watch her, make sure she didn't become Darquesse.

The house was dark and quiet. Her family was out. She was glad about that, at least. She didn't want them to worry. Her phone sat beside her. She had formed a plan to get Skulduggery back from the Faceless Ones, and she needed another plan. She picked up the phone and dialled. When the person on the other line picked up, she swallowed.

"Tanith, it's me. I need your help."

**And there you go. It isn't overly funny, but review and tell me if you liked it, loved it, hated it, meh'd it. The next chapters will hopefully be better.**


	2. Hats Off to the Prison Break

**Hi, I'm back again. Yes, Luna, I agree. For me, it might have been a little dark, but this chapter is full of funnyness and facepalming idiotness. So it's more my kind of chapter, if you know what I mean. Enjoy this chapter. **

**And thanks to Flame Kitty 12 for going a little bit nuts and favouriting every single one of my SP fanfics. **

**Also, do you know what is really embarassing? I thought I was the only one in my family in, you know, the general vicintiy, so I started to sing 'Fight for you', but I don't know it's by, but I'm sure you know the one. And I might have had a paper towel roll cardboard thingy in my hand, so I started using it as a microphone, and I finish the first bit, pretending I'm up on stage, and I turn around and my stepdad is standing there, watching me. TOTAL AWKS!**

**2**

**Hats Off to the Prison Break**

Sanguine stepped out of the wall and into the cell. The skeleton looked at him, then stood up. Sanguine held up his hands. "Relax. The lil' darlin' herself sent me. She said to tell you: be brave, the sparrow flies south for the winter. Dunno' what it means, but there you go. I guess it means something to you." Sanguine looked at Skulduggery, and Skulduggery looked at Sanguine. He grinned. "Do you think, tha' when we get on outta here, I could get a autograph? Lord Vile was my favourite killer when I was growin' up."

"If you get my phone, gun and hat for me, I'll believe you," Skulduggery replied.

"An' the autograph?"

The skeleton sighed. "I'll see what I can do."

"Don't go anywhere. I'll be back before you know it," Sanguine grinned, sinking down through the floor.

Sanguine appeared behind the kid at the desk. He couldn't have been more than twenty-something, and Sanguine grabbed him, then slammed his head into the wall. There was a hat sitting on the desk, so Sanguine picked it up. Not seeing anywhere he could put it and actually remember it, he put it on. He pulled out his razor and admired his reflection in the blade. He nodded, satisfied with his appearance, and started digging through the drawers. He quite liked the hat, actually. He could see why Skulduggery wore it. Sanguine pulled out a gun. He couldn't sure if it was the right one, but it was similar to the one that seemed to be pointed at him often. There was a phone here as well, so he pulled that out too. He hit the button, and the lock screen flashed up. He chuckled at the selfy of Valkyrie she had no doubt put up. She was wearing a hat as well. Who could've guessed he and girl had so much in common. Sanguine shackled the kid to the desk, then put the key on the opposite corner, then, grinning, he sank through the floor and burrowed back into Skulduggery's cell.

He handed over the phone and the gun, forgetting about the hat entirely until the skeleton tilted his head. Sanguine sheepishly took it off and passed it over, watching as Skulduggery adjusted it until it sat perfectly.

"And now I feel complete," Skulduggery nodded.

"Ready to go then? You never know when someone's gonna come an' see the kid unconscious."

"OK then. Go ahead and do whatever it is you do."

They stood there awkwardly, neither of them moving.

"I can only take you with me if you'r touchin' me," Sanguine said finally.

"I kind of dislike touching people. Unless I'm beating them up. I have a space thing."

"Well, get over tha' dislike and thing, or you can spend the rest of your life in prison. I'll send a postcard, maybe. I'm sure the lil' darlin' will."

Skulduggery sighed. "There's something I need to see before we leave." He reached out and placed a hand on Sanguine's shoulder.

"If you say so," Sanguine grinned and the earth parted and the darkness swallowed them whole.

There was a car waiting for them. A bright green car. Sanguine quite liked the colour. It reminded him of a beach, somewhere. Or maybe the pub back home in Texas. Either way, he liked the car.

"You didn't exactly pick an inconspicuous coloured car, did you?" Skulduggery said.

"Only car I could... find on such short notice. Now stop complainin' an' get in the car,' Sanguine said, unlocking the doors. Both of them moved to get in the drivers seat. Sanguine frowned at Skulduggery. "What do you think is goin' on here?"

"Forgive me if I'm a little hesitant to get in a car that has a psychopath behind the wheel," Skulduggery replied.

"Well, then, Skeleton. You haven't lived. Not really anyway."

**Sorry, just a short one, but the next chapter is long. And hopefully funny. :D**


	3. We're Off to Catch a Skeleton

**3.**

**We're Off to Catch a Skeleton **

Dexter Vex looked at the people sitting across from him. Five familiar faces stared back. It had felt like ages, eons even, since they had last met, but in reality, it had only been last month. Aurora Jane, as fragile looking as ever. Not that he would ever say that to her face. Gracious O'Callahan and Donegan Bane, the Monster Hunters. Frightening Jones. And Autumn Pledge, a quiet girl with auburn hair and green eyes. And, simply by being in this room, with the exception of Gracious, were now considered traitors in their countries. They knew the risk, and he was touched that they were still going to help.

Dexter looked at his watch.

Aurora was the first to speak. "We're waiting for Saracen to get here, aren't we?"

Dexter was spared the need to answer as Saracen Rue, the final member of the team, entered the room. "Sorry about that. I had a thing with a thing, and it got complicated. But it's over, and I'm here now.."

"He says that everytime," Aurora whispered to Autumn, loudly enough for everyone to hear.

Saracen winked at her, then turned his attention to everyone else. "Nice to see you all again so soon." He spotted Autumn and smiled. "I don't believe we've met. I'm Saracen Rue."

"Autumn Pledge. Hi," she smiled back at him, speaking with an Australian accent.

Saracen nodded then turned to Dexter, rubbing his hands together. "So what crazy adventure are we on now?"

"You might want to have a seat," Dexter replied. Everyone looked at him. "Last night, a prisoner escaped from custody. We need to find him, and his accomplices, as soon as possible."

"Doesn't Skulduggery normally do that sort of thing?" Saracen asked.

Aurora nodded. "We normally go after insanely powerful weapons, then lose them all to the enemy." She saw the confused look Autumn was giving her. "It's a long story. I'll explain later."

"That's the problem," Dexter said, taking control of the conversation before it too far off topic. "Skulduggery can't do that. We've found out the identity of Lord Vile."

Saracen's mouth turned down. "Please tell you're aren't going to say what I think you're going to say."

"If I'm going to say what you think I'm going to say, then I'm going to have to say it."

"Please explain what's going on," Donegan said.

"I got lost after Saracen finished speaking," Gracious agreed.

"Skulduggery is Lord Vile. Was Lord Vile. Whatever. The point is, he let himself be arrested, but Billy-Ray Sanguine came and busted him out. We have people watching his house, but they didn't get into place until early this morning. They haven't reported anything, but he could be anywhere." There were mutterings around the room. "There's more, though. We've found out who Darquesse is." All eyes turned to him again. "The retrieval of Skulduggery Pleasant and Valkyrie Cain is our primary objective. We don't want to kill them. We want to help Valkyrie. Or, Ravel does anyway. If we can't bring them in, then we need to kill them. We've spoken to Valkyrie's reflection, but it doesn't know anything. We don't know if Sanguine is still with them."

"How are we going to figure out where they are? None of us here are detectives. None of us know the first thing about detecting," Aurora said.

"First of all, both Saracen and I know a bit about detecting. I told about the Jerry case, didn't I? I'm pretty sure I did. Second of all, none of us need to know anything about detecting. We have Autumn."

Everyone looked at Autumn and she turned red. "How are you going to help us? Oh God, you aren't a 'clairvoyant'_, _are you?" Aurora did quotations marks at clairvoyant. Autumn shook her head. "And you don't use symbols, do you?"

She shook her head, then nodded, then shrugged. "I have a passable knowledge of the language, but I'm a Transfauna."

"When you say passable, do you mean _passable, _or need a classroom maths set to draw them?"

"Passable as in I can draw them freehand."

"Transfauna?" Frightening asked, speaking for the first time.

"I can transform in various animals, both real and not real. There is a side affect. Senses, attributes and reactions become heightened."

"How is that going to help us find them?"

"I'm a tracker. A headhunter, if you will. Either way, it's my business to find people, or other marks. I'm here as a favour to Dexter."

"Oh, you two know each other?" Aurora asked, at the same time as Dexter asked "what do you mean, favour to me?"

"Sorry, I meant to say favour for Grand Mage Ravel," Autumn said.

"Right then. Any other questions? No? Are you sure? No questions at all? None abosolutely?"

"Maybe you should asking that before people think of questions. Every moment we spend disussing semantics is a moment Skulduggery has to get away from us," Saracen said.

"Good idea. Right, use the toilets now if you need them. There's a white van outside. You need to be there in five minutes." Saracen and Dexter waited until everyone had left before walking off together.

"Do you think we can do this? We've known Skulduggery for years. We fought alongside him," Saracen said.

Dexter shrugged. "I don't know. I hope so."

Saracen grunted, then changed the subject. "That Autumn girl. There's something about her that... I don't know. She's hiding something. I know that much."

"Any idea what?"

"No. But I get the feeling it has something to do with you. That mistake, I don't know that it was a mistake."

"We'll have to keep an eye on her. I think Aurora will kill me if I managed to get another Scream."

Five minutes later, as Dexter had planned, thanks to Saracen sticking with him, the white van left. Dexter and Saracen were in the front, and everytime Dexter looked into the rear-view mirror, he would see Autumn. She was staring out the window, or chatting to the others. She didn't seem like the traitor type, but then again, neither had Wilhelm. Saracen's words had him worried.

"So, do we have a plan or anything?" Donegan asked. Everyone stopped talking and looked at him, then to Dexter.

"We do. We were going to go to Skulduggery's house first, then let Fall do her thing, and she can take us to Skulduggery and Valkyrie, and then, that's where the plan is subject is to change. Depending on the situation, we alter the plan accordingly."

"That's...actually a good plan," Aurora said, sounding a little surprised. "Did you come up with that yourself?"

"I did, actually," Dexter replied, turning left.

"I- wow. Are you sure?"

"I think I would know if I came up with the plan, don't you think?"

"Just making sure."

"Dex," Saracen said, interrupting the conversation. "Do you think we could stop? I have to pee."

**It might help if you have read Tanith Low and the Maleficent Seven. **


	4. On The Run

**4**

**On the Run**

"Did I tell you," Tanith Low said, sitting on the bench top. "That Billy-Ray and I are engaged?"

Valkyrie turned around so fast she nearly fell out of the chair she was sitting on. "You're WHAT?!"

"Engaged," Tanith repeated, like she was commenting on the weather.

Valkyrie stared at her. "Please tell me you aren't be serious. Please."

"Val, I'm being totally serious. Why can't you be happy for me? I'm sure Darquesse would be happy for me."

"I doubt it."

Tanith grinned. "How about we wake her up and see?"

"No. No way. Abosolutly no way at all." Valkyrie looked at her. "You aren't supposed to be like this. You're supposed to be good. You're supposed to fight the bad guys. You're supposed to end up with Ghastly, and help us save the world. And now you're marrying the bad guy. More than that, you are the bad guy. This isn't the way things are supposed to turn out."

"You know life doesn't always turn out like it does in the movies. You just have to accept that. Can you accept that?"

"I won't. Life isn't set in stone. I'm not going to be Darquesse, and you aren't going to be like this forever. I won't let it be this way."

They heard a car pull up, and they both got to the their feet. Sanguine wrapped his arms around Tanith, and Valkyrie looked away, as Skulduggery walked over to her.

"You told them."

It was more of a statement than a question, but she nodded anyway. "I had too. I can't fight this without you."

"You don't have to." Skulduggery looked at her and tilted his head. "What's wrong?"

"Tanith," Valkyrie replied, keeping her voice low. "They're engaged."

"There isn't a lot we can do, other than try to make sure nothing else happens and, if possible, try to get her to the Sanctuary so she can get help."

"If the two of you are quite finished plotting, maybe we should get a move on. I'm sure whoever they're sending after you will look here first," Tanith said.

"Give us a few minutes," Skulduggery replied. He and Valkyrie moved to another of his many rooms.

"You're taking the armour?" she asked, watching as he touched a section of the wall. A symbol flashed up and the section slid down, to reveal the case that held Vile's armour.

"I have to. It's too dangerous to leave here." The wall slid back into place.

"Where are we going to go?" Valkyrie asked.

"First we need to get somewhere. Then after that we can focus on where we need to go."

She nodded slowly. "So where's the somewhere we're going?"

"I haven't worked that out yet. Are they coming?"

"I don't know. Tanith said something about it."

"Then we need to keep an eye on her. And if anyone catches up, they might come in handy."

"We can't leave the country. Skulduggery, where are we going to go? Sooner or later, they're going to catch up to us."

"We _can_ leave the country. It just won't be easy."

Valkyrie hated the car. It was an ugly, bright green car. She sat in the passenger seat, and Sanguine and Tanith were in the back. There had been a heartstopping moment when a familiar van passed on the other side of the road, but thankfully the van didn't turn around. Skulduggery was looking at something on his phone, his head tilted. He tapped at it, and a second later, Valkyrie's phone buzzed. She looked at the screen, then at Skulduggery.

_Good news, _the text said. Valkyire raised an eyebrow and her phone buzzed again. _I don't want to risk them overhearing. I found our somewhere._

_And where would that somewhere be?_

_I know a person who knows a person who might know someone else who is an expert on true names._

_And that means?_

_We pay a visit to the first person, who sends us to their friend, who in turn sends us to the person they know._

_And how does this last person help us?_

_I don't know yet._ _But being me, I'm sure I can work it out._

Valkyrie sighed. _Then lets get a move on._


	5. Pre-War Pleasantries

**I just realise that in the last chapter, Skulduggery as texting and driving. Naughty Skulduggery. Also, one the funniest SP fanfic's I have ever read was one where Skulduggery gets drunk. It was hilarious. I loved it. You should read it, if you haven't already read it. It's called: **

**5**

**Pre-War Pleasantries**

Ravel was not happy. He hadn't been happy since the start of this mess, but now he really wasn't happy. Aside from the escape of a top-priority prisoner, Skulduggery, Valkyrie had disappeared, presumably being the one to bust him out, but the Elders were getting a lot of pressure from the international community. They were all clamouring for war, certain that if it came to that, the combined power of just about every Sanctuary from around the world would crush the Irish and their allies. Not that they had many allies. Other Sanctuary's were terrified that if they stood with the Irish, it would only turn the international community on them. Ravel didn't really blame them. He couldn't. Faced with the same choice, he wasn't sure what his answer would be, and _that _was what scared him.

And Ghastly was... incredibly upset. Or annoyed. Or maybe even angry. _Or, _Ravel thought, _it could be all three. _He supposed finding out that one of your longest and closest friends had been the one to kill your mother, and many of your allies, came back, mourned the loss, fought beside you and never told you would upset, annoy or anger anyone. And Mist was just Mist. Quiet and unassuming and cold and calculating and creepy as always. In the meetings that were occuring with increasing, and alarming, regularity, no one was saying much any more. Ghastly sulked and Mist... did whatever it was that she normally did when she didn't say much at council meetings.

The attitude of the Sanctuary in general seemed to reflect the current situation. Tense and tiring and perfectly able to keep Ravel awake at night.

He was exhausted. He hadn't slept properly in, God, it must have been at least four days, when his body had just shut down for a few hours and he fell asleep on the paperwork he had been looking at. That, at least, had been two hours of much needed sleep.

_I could definetly use a holiday. Maybe everyone should just have a day off. _Ravel smiled to himself. That sounded like heaven. _Just have a day off and forget about everything for a while. _Not for the first time, he marveled at how well Meritorious had run things. And not for the first time, he was overcome by petty jealousy by how easy they had had it. They didn't have to deal with Remnants and Death Bringers and Argeddions and unheard of War between Sanctuary's and the end of the world and God knows what else.

But he was determined to ignore all of that, except maybe the war, while he spoke, for what could be the last time as part of a now uneasy truce between Sanctuary's, to the stupid Supreme Council about the stupid pre-war pleasantries. He passed a Cleaver standing guard at a door, and for some bizarre reason, felt the urge to ask the tall, silent, grey statue something. He didn't know what. Just something. Anything. But he didn't have time, so he merely nodded and pushed open the door.

Mist was there, in the veil and dress, and Ghastly stood behind. He looked as tired as Ravel felt. Ravel took his place in the space between them and waited.

Symbols faded up from seemingly nothing, and a memory of speaking to Skulduggery and Valkyrie surfaced. They were using the same type of contact. Presently, Grand Mages Bisahalani and Warheit materialised, with the new English Grand Mage, Cornelius Ode, beside them.

"Have you considered our proposal any futher?" Warheit asked, in his slow voice. He looked about sixty, with steely hair and steely eyes. Bisahalani was rounded and looked a little younger than the majority of most Grand Mages, only about mid-fourties and with the beginnings of grey hair.

"We have," Ravel replied.

"And?"

"And we decided it would be in our Sanctuary's best intrests to decline."

A shadow passed over the faces of the Supreme Mages. "I would be intersted to hear how you came to _that _conclusion," Bisahalani said.

"Sanctuary's are the highest powers, or are supposed to be, anyway," Ravel said, looking pointedly at them. "For one to be governed by foreign powers would be unthinkable. The scramble for dominance to fill the sudden and damaging vacuum could cause more damage than said vacuum. In making this decision, we had to not only consider ourself, but a Sanctuary's primary objective. And, as we here all know, that is to keep the mortal population from finding out about us. The risk of the scramble being seen was too great. So I'm afraid we have to decline."

"We are willing to give you a few more days to consider this," Ode said, speaking fo the first time.

"We don't need a few more days. We are not going to roll over simply because you ask us to."

"Then you doom your entire Sanctuary, not to mention those who stand with it."

"So be it," Ravel said. Bisahalani opened his mouth to say something else, but Ravel turned. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have somewhere that I need to be." He walked out without waiting for a response and headed back to his office. When he got there, he sat down at his desk, waited a moment, then, with a dull _thunk_, his forehead met his desk.

There was a knock on the door. "Go away," he mumbled, voice muffled by the mountains of paper littering the desk. The door opened and Ghastly walked in. "I'm pretty sure that's the exact opposite of what I said."

"'_It would be in our Sanctuary's best intrests to decline_'?" Ghastly asked. "Where the hell did that come from? And why the hell weren't Mist and I informed about that?"

"You _were _informed. What do you think all those meetings were about? Discussing the weather?" Ravel took his head off the desk and glared at Ghastly. "_We_, as in the three of us, are facing an unprecedented international crisis. But Mist sits there doing whatever it is she does, and you sit there doing whatever it is you do. I'm expected to run these decisions by you, yet when I do, you sit there sulking. And you complain. If we want to have any hope of coming out of this war unscathed, the three of us need to stop trying to kill each other and start working like a team."

Ravel and Ghastly stared at each other for a long time, then Ghastly shook his head.

"You're right. I'm sorry. It's just..."

"I know. I didn't expect it either. But what's in the past is in the past. Right now, we need to look to now and focus on not dying and not losing. After that, we can dicuss the... information."

"You're right. Again."

Ravel smiled ruefully. "That's becoming a habit."

There was silence. Then Ghastly sighed. "We need something more if we want to win."

Ravel nodded. "We need the Dead Men."

**And I think that is actually one of the best chapters I've ever written. Even though it wasn't that funny. But I like it.**


End file.
